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March 21, 2007
Morning Prayer Thoughts
The antiphon for the first psalm for today's Morning Prayer is My heart is ready, O God, my heart is ready.
I read the antiphon this morning and my immediate reaction was a recoil. "No, it isn't. Not even close. My heart is no where near ready." There are too many things in it, on it, around it. At best it is a divided heart, not a simple heart--a singular gift for a Simple God.
I couldn't pray this in all honesty. But also in all honesty, I could say, "I want my heart to be ready, O God, make my heart ready." That, I could say because it true at the core, at the very marrow of bones. I want to be ready, I know I am not. My heart is half hard, half missing--a rocky field fit only for weeds and dodder--a shadow life thrown into relief by the season in which shadows are drawn more sharply and light is more visible.
So even though I needed to pray a different antiphon, my whole heart was captivated by the second line of the psalm--so much so that I spent the rest of the prayer there and carry it forward into the day--
I will sing, sing your praise.
in the hopes that
Awake, my soul
I will wake from my deliberate slumber and see, if only for a moment--a moment is that that it takes for a God as magnificent as the one we stand before every moment. Blind and deaf though I am, He will save me.
Posted by Steven Riddle at 7:19 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack